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As I fuss around the kitchen preparing for our Christmas celebration tomorrow, I listen to my new favorite Christmas song, “Mary, Did You Know”. My favorite version is a cappella, without instrumental accompaniment. I am amazed by the musical group talent. I’m also brought to tears by the beauty of the lyrics. Have you ever had that happen? The effect on emotions is just one example of the power of music.

Music Superpowers

Music can change the ordinary into the extraordinary!

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Music has long been known to effect mood, decrease stress and increase energy. Studies also show that it also can boost your immune system, increase your athletic performance, help recall memories and possibly complement epilepsy treatment to reduce seizures. Music has a tremendous effect on the human condition whether composed, learned or listened to. WOW! I personally love music—many different types—so I’m glad this is an addiction with positive effects. On that note—pun intended:)—music can also assist with conquering various addictions!

Music in My Life

I’ve always loved music! Even before I knew it’s superpowers.

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My earliest memory—or maybe my parents’—is of circling around the living room pulling a string for my kitty to chase while my little 45 rpm record player accompanied us. I was still doing a version of this several years later—dancing with friends instead of a kitty—when I got my first album, “Saturday Night Fever” by the BeeGees. I think I just aged myself, lol!

In 5th grade, I took up the clarinet. I begged my parents for piano lessons but we didn’t have much money (or a piano!) and nobody, including me, knew if I’d actually get serious and practice. Well…yes, I did! I still laugh with my dad about all the clarinet squawking as I honed my skill those first few years. Practice paid off, though, and I actually had some talent. I played in my high school band, All-State Band and the University of MN marching band. But that was a while ago. Last time I tried playing that old clarinet sounded like the first time and my lips swelled up to twice their size!

But do I sing or dance, you ask? Singing…not well. I think I’m like most everyone else—I perform my best concerts in the car and the shower! With the music pumped very, very loud. Dancing, on the other hand, I’ve actually done in public. As a Zumba instructor! In 2002, when my first kiddo was 2, I got certified as a fitness instructor. And in 2010, after falling in love with a latin dance class, I took up Zumba. One of the best things ever! Anybody can—and should—dance…a lot!

Using the Power of Music

Whatever your favorite flavor of music, immersing yourself in it on a regular basis can elevate your mood, energy and athletic performance. The added benefits of stress reduction, recalling joyful memories, and an immune system boost, might boost your mood even more! It certainly does mine. Music can make you happy! How about turning off the tv and turning up the music! 🎶

Are you a positive person? Are you energized by the people you chose to surround yourself with? Ongoing research highlights the major effect that our mood has on both our physical and emotional health. Working to stay positive and being surrounded by positive people can boost quality of life and help you live longer. It’s a win–win!

Optimist or Pessimist

We all know people, including ourselves, that we would classify as either optimists or pessimists. The old adage “cup half-full, or half-empty” comes to mind.

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• Optimists see the bright side of things, even when going through rough times. They are hopeful, positive, and believe that good will ultimately triumph over evil.

• Pessimists are the opposite. These folks tend to dwell on problems and believe things are really bad and getting worse. They also seem to enjoy pulling others down with them (“misery loves company”).

Everyone falls somewhere on the positivity continuum and we appear to be born with a particular tendency toward either optimism or pessimism. But we don’t have to be stuck in a rut if we don’t like where we are. Learning how to mindfully reframe our thoughts, either on our own or with the help of a professional, can change how we see the world.

Choose Happy

I love life and I love people!

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I think I’m an optimistic, positive person, and most of the people I know would agree. I’m extremely grateful for my life, especially since cancer, so I try to verbalize that gratitude. I smile a lot—that makes a difference!—and strive to be kind and friendly. I believe in handing out compliments with abandon and listening when someone needs to talk. If I really don’t like someone, I try to quietly exit the situation. Avoiding gossip and looking for the best in others is also really important. My hope is that I leave people feeling better than they did before we spent time together.

Spend Time With Positive People

Happiness is contagious!

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Besides working to maintain a positive attitude for myself (which some days can be hard when cancer recurrence thoughts try to steal my joy), I try to surround myself with positive people. They make me feel energized and able to conquer the world!

This starts with the great family—immediate and extended—I am blessed to have. Fun activities with girlfriends—lunch, golf, tennis, walk/talk—are an anticipated pleasure. Interest in fitness and nutrition make my time with health club co-workers and members super enjoyable.

And for those few continuously negative people in my world? Well, I do my best to limit time with them. This may mean slowly disengaging with a once-close friend, neighbor or family member. And the closer they once were, the harder this is. I just really focus on remembering how mood affects health and work to put myself in a good place. And then I call one of those positive people I love!

Happy and Healthy

Positivity, inside and out, is a great predictor of health and longevity. Because people are social beings, this requires positive relationships with one another. Love your neighbor as yourself (Mark 12:31). Now go shine your light! And look for others to do the same!

mir·a·cle/ˈmirək(ə)l/

• a surprising and welcome event that is not explicable by natural or scientific laws and is therefore considered to be the work of a divine agency.
• a highly improbable or extraordinary event, development, or accomplishment that brings very welcome consequences.
• an amazing product or achievement, or an outstanding example of something.

Every day we hear about the tragedies happening around the world. They are on all the television news channels, radio stations and posted on Facebook. How often do we hear about the miracles – big or small – happening? Not so much. But they ARE happening, every day. Oftentimes, it depends on how you define a miracle and what your mindset is.

Big Miracles

The first thing I think of when I think of a miracle is something huge and wonderful and completely unexplainable.

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I’m talking about the creation of heaven and earth, living organisms (you, me…frogs, trees), and how everything in our existence works together in a complex, synergistic rhythm. Although we are learning more every day, I don’t think Science can explain all this.

The range of human emotions and the courageous and compassionate actions people take to help others are amazing. I personally believe in the soul, and love how art, music and faith speak to and complete it. If it was all just about survival, I see no need to help the helpless or feed the soul.

Amazing, extraordinary miracles.

Little Miracles

Miracles may be small and affect just one person, or be only in the eye of the beholder.

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Think about how your favorite song comes on the radio just when you are feeling really blue. Or when your child or pet comes running to you for a hug when you walk in the door. How about the tingly feeling you get in your toes as you think about someone special?

Miracles or not miracles? The song timing is improbable, and the love is extraordinary. I choose miracles!

Personal Miracles

Several miracles have blessed my life. Among these, three were truly life saving. My parents tell me two stories about growing up. The third story is why I’m here creating a website—it was scary, vivid and never to be forgotten.

Miracle 1

I was 6 years old. We were driving home from grandma’s house and stopped in a small town for coffee and donuts. My parents say that because I insisted on staying for a second donut, we just missed being caught in a tornado. That tornado crossed our path home, leaving destruction along and across the highway. Thank goodness for donuts!

Miracle 2

This one I remember, I was 8. My dad and I were at the hardware store and Dad gave me money for the gumball machine. I popped the gumball in my mouth and started sucking the candy coating off, rather than chewing it. When I tried to talk, I inhaled the gumball and it got stuck in my windpipe. My airway was completely blocked and I turned blue. The store owner grabbed me from behind and tried the Heimlich maneuver. Unfortunately, it didn’t work. There happened to be a doctor shopping in the store who heard the commotion. He asked if he could help and then reached down my throat with his pinky and pulled the gumball out. I wouldn’t be here today if he hadn’t stepped in.

Miracle 3

My third lifesaving miracle? The one that pulled me out of a scary, vivid and never to be forgotten experience?

The third miracle is the success of my breast cancer treatment. What an emotional ride that was! It still is in fact, because the journey continues through recurrence prevention. Conventional treatments including chemotherapy, surgery, radiation and hormone therapy, combined with the complimentary therapies of nutrition and exercise, healed me. Well, that’s not exactly true. Actually, God healed me. I found my Faith and He responded. He gave me strength, led me to the right people at the right time, and showed me the right online resources I needed to assist in my own healing. I thank God every day for opening my heart, answering my prayers, and walking with me through the valley. My—His— medical team was amazing in their skill, commitment and compassion. Likewise, my family and friends were astounding in their love and support. Without my ‘earthly angels’ I would’ve been, and would still be, in a bad place.

Miracles All Around

I look for miracles each and every day.

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Continuing on my life journey, I choose to find miracles in simple things. Simple things like the birth of a child (not so simple), the beauty of a summer day, or the love and companionship of family and good friends. This mindset brings me joy and peace. It also keeps me from getting sucked into the negativity permeating our world. Like most, I need a purpose and reason beyond myself to feel fulfilled. So I look for those earthly angels who cross my path. I keep my eyes open for the opportunity to help others. And I try to shine God’s light so others may see the miracles too.

As I wake from my after-Thanksgiving dinner nap (yes, those of you who know me are sagely nodding), I’m struck once-again by the materialism I see on television and in my email box. It’s there throughout the year, but really ramps up in these weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas. The pressure to buy ‘stuff’ for yourself and those you love at outrageously ‘low’ prices for the holidays. It used to be that stores and people started the shopping frenzy in the wee hours of Black Friday morning. Now some stores open Thanksgiving evening to get a jump on their competition. Is this really necessary? I don’t think so. It’s not about the stuff!

Childhood Traditions – About the People

Thanksgiving

Growing up, my family went to my aunt and uncle’s house for Thanksgiving dinner. It was a tradition.

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We would bring some special dishes to share and my aunt always cooked to feed a crowd, no one ever went home hungry. The house was small with one television. They had five kids, we had two. If you add the adults, we had a nice group of 11. As the kids grew up, our dinner guest list grew up too, with spouses and grandkids. What loud, messy, fun times we had! How I looked forward to those dinners! (Btw, those post-dinner naps got started here, with lots of joking and ribbing). The only gifts were the tasty leftovers that everyone took home.

Christmas

My family went to my grandparents—both sets—as part of our Christmas tradition.

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We all lived in MN so winters tend to be cold. It never really felt that way, too much love and drama going on, especially on my mom’s side of the family. My mom’s family was big—9 kids—and diverse in their ages and interests. I had so many aunts and uncles, cousins and step cousins, I’d be hard pressed to name them all. Some portion of the family—whoever was available that year—got together in my grandparent’s big brick house to celebrate family and the birth of Christ. The meals were healthy and home cooked, the gifts that were exchanged were simple and often handmade or hand-me-downs. With so many kids around, we didn’t care.

My dad’s family was smaller, just him and his sister, with a total of 5 grandkids. Those Christmas’ were just as fun! Small group, lots of hugs and joking (grandpa loved to laugh). Simple gifts exchanged. I wouldn’t trade a moment.

New Traditions – About the People

Every generation has family traditions. They take what they loved—or missed—from childhood and make it their own.

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Now that I’m “all grown up” with my own family, we have our own family traditions. Thanksgiving is at my parents’ house and Christmas is at our house. It’s a small but loving group.

We missed Thanksgiving at my parents’ this year due to some unusual conflicts, and we really missed it. Like REALLY missed it. And it wasn’t the food (“the stuff”), which is good but not fabulously amazing, it was the fellowship! It was the people and the connection! Note to self: We will NOT miss Christmas!

Not the Stuff

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not against shopping.

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In fact, shopping with family or friends can be amazing fun! I just don’t think it is as important as we make it out to be during this holiday time. The holidays are for other things.

I believe they are about celebrating the people we love – family, friends, and friendly strangers – and God.

The abundance of gatherings, the food (yum!), the smiles, hugs and laughter are amazingly life affirming. And it doesn’t matter if the gatherings are big family get-togethers with all the drama that inevitably happens, or small groups of friends, or fellowship at your church. Every positive connection we make nourishes our soul.

It’s the People

As I get older, I realize that my loved ones are getting older too and won’t be here forever, which makes it so much more important to cherish our time now. Life is upredictible, age doesn’t matter, there’s no guarantee of what tomorrow will bring. Intellectually we know that, but how often do we really ‘know that’ as we fritter away precious moments? The stuff—television, video games, and phone/Facebook—can wait.

Get up, get out, love someone today. Help someone today. Smile at someone today. Say a kind word to someone today.

Do something that matters! You’ll be glad you did.

Most of us have been guilty of jumping to conclusions at one time or another. I know I have! It happens when we make assumptions, or hasty judgements, before learning or considering all the facts. Recognizing that these conclusions are mostly negative and almost always wrong, why do we do it? Let’s pause, take a breath and remember—don’t jump to conclusions.

My Latest “Jump”

Last month I went to the dermatologist for a skin cancer screening.

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It had been 3 years since my last check and I wanted to get all caught up on my health ‘to do’ list. I thought I could take care of a planter wart on my foot at the same time.

That simple skin screening, it turned into a 4 site biopsy session! I went in not expecting any issues and came out completely frazzled. I was worried and upset. What was going on? Also, it was summer—I love summer—and I wasn’t allowed to jump in the lake until the biopsy sites were healed. Not a great day. I started jumping to conclusions.

Waiting is Hard

Tick-tock.

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As I (kind of) celebrated 4th of July on the lake—no swimming!—I waited impatiently for the results and the healing from the skin biopsies. I finally called the dermatologist.

Results from the nurse…

• 1 benign mole
• 1 basal cell carcinoma—skin cancer
• 2 dysplastic moles requiring excision for clear margins.

What?! I was shocked. This meant more trips to the dermatologist, more summer fun postponed and more questions.

• What exactly is basal cell carcinoma skin cancer?

• What about deadly melanoma skin cancer?

I was immediately on the internet researching these results and what they meant for me. Whew, okay, basal cell carcinoma is different than melanoma. Easily treatable. Next. Another win, the chances of “severe dysplastic moles” hiding melanoma cancer beneath them is slim.

BUT POSSIBLE.

I found all the scary worst case scenarios…

Jumping to Conclusions

What kind of conclusions? The worst kind.

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My mind immediately jumped to very deep, dark conclusions. Doomsday scenarios interrupted my thoughts day and night. I was sure my days were numbered. This fear consumed me for a week as I waited for my followup dermatology appointment.

When my appointment finally arrived, I responded with tears to the nurse’s innocent question, “how are you doing?”.  All of my fears spilled out in a rush. I obviously wasn’t the first tearful patient she’d seen. She quickly stepped out and brought the dermatologist into the room.

The dermatologist calmly explained…

• I did not have melanoma
• They didn’t expect to find melanoma hiding under my moles
• The clear margin requirement was (only) a precaution to prevent future melanoma.

The doc also apologized that the nurse’s call the week previous hadn’t made this clear to me.  She cautioned me to use sunscreen and keep a close eye on my skin. Through my research, I’d found out breast cancer survivors are more prone to melanoma than the general public. Not fair! Even so, I walked out of there with a big bandaid on my back and a big smile on my face. I was going to live another day! The fact that I was still banned from lake swimming was completely forgotten.

Wait for the Facts (and Relax)

Moral of the story? Try not to jump to conclusions. They are often wrong and can cause unneeded anxiety and stress.

I realize that my reaction to the dermatology experience was very different than it would’ve been before my breast cancer diagnosis. For better or worse, our life experiences shape us and how we perceive the world. I now know if something DOES come up, it’s much better to take a deep breath, clear your mind and approach it calmly.  That’s what I hope to do next time!

(In case you were wondering, the planter wart on my foot wasn’t actually a  plantar wart, it was a corn! Back to the internet…)

Before being diagnosed with breast cancer in 2016, I don’t think I fully understood what it means to “be grateful always”.  Sure, I enjoyed my life—a lot.  I had married my college sweetheart, traveled, enjoyed a successful business career, retired to raise our children and then started working part-time as a fitness instructor.  I had a passion for health, fitness and fun and I loved my family fiercely.  But, somehow, I got lost in all the fun.  Everyone was so busy, we started to drift apart.   Active husband, active teenage boys with all their stuff – it was a game of divide and conquer.  I rarely thought about the here and now but was focused on the next thing.

The Catalyst

Then…Boom!  Just another day, took a shower, felt a lump, got it checked.  Breast cancer.  Cry, cry, cry on my husband’s shoulder.  Felt my life was over, wondered “why me?”.  Cry again.  And again.  After I was cried out, I got busy sorting out what I needed to do to keep on living.  What steps, what treatment, where, when, how.  Life was a whirlwind for the next month as I lived on the phone, or the internet, or in the doctor’s office.

The Response

Slow…down.  Decisions made, time to let family and friends know about diagnosis and start treatment.  The morning after high school Homecoming, my husband took the boys to breakfast and filled them in.  Made phone calls, sent emails, posted to my mom’s and husband’s FB (I didn’t have a FB account).  Next day infusion Smart Port in, weekly chemotherapy begins.

The Change

This is when I started my faith journey.  I prayed daily, several times a day, for a miracle.  I’d been in my church high school youth group, married in church and had our boys baptized but hadn’t done much else.  Isn’t it funny how you turn to God in the bad times but often forget about Him during the good?  That was me in a nutshell.  Thank goodness God doesn’t hold grudges.  He was there for me when I called and sent me many, many earthly angels to help me through this journey.  And that’s when I started to realize what “be grateful always” really means.

Grateful

To me “be grateful always” means I wake up each morning and before I get out of bed, I thank God for another day on this earth. I don’t care if it’s rainy, snowy, freezing cold or blazing hot – I’m just glad to be here!  

I also thank Him for my family and friends, and for my health and the health of those I love. I ask for continued health for us all.

For those that need them, I send specific prayers up. Keeping a prayer list makes sure that if I tell someone I’ll pray for them, I mean it.

Every day I try to show and say “I love you” or “I care about you” to everyone in my life.  Why wait?  No guarantees on tomorrow.  Many wonderful people helped me in my time of need, both friends and friendly strangers.  It’s time for me to pay that forward, backward and sideways!